memeseverdie:

hexpress:

anz100:

carbonfiberpersonality:

Southerner: oh man, there’s snow!1!! Guess we better uh… Not do a driving! *Drives 10 mph while sobbing*

Northerner: *driving a stick shift 80 mph in slick iced roads while eating a full cheese plate and blaring led zeppelins’ “immigrant song”*

I’m Californian and I have the balls to do this.

californian found dead wearing a murrsuit in a 2003 honda civic after encountering black ice for the first time and careening off of I-95

Californian found frozen to death in 50 degree weather

animedads:

Bayonetta: *eating spaghetti*

God, like, literally God, from the Bible, appearing from the sky and destroying Bayonetta’s house: [UNINTELLIGIBLE]

Bayonetta, flying on a shard of her roof: man what the fuck

mixolydia:

multiple ear piercings is the only answer

lilcowgirl4:

It’s not that you have issues…… it’s that you have a tendency to continue using instincts you picked up in childhood that are no longer useful to you on your journey towards achieving openness and intimacy and reliability in your personal relationships w others. It’s not that you’re defective or difficult or incapable it’s just that what you learned to do to save yourself from the experience of abandonment or rejection or ridicule or failure is not helpful here anymore and you need to start thinking creatively and collaborating on better ways to cope with that instrinsic fear that you are not correct, that you are faking, that you will be found out and left, whatever it is

silversarcasm:

all the alexa/google home shit feels like a dystopian nightmare and everytime someone mentions having one in their home i have a sudden urge to break into thier house and destroy it